I took him to my brothers summer cabin up in the Adirondack Mountains. This was a test. Most people can't hack it. I wanted to know if he could chop wood, relax, and go with the flow of no running water, no electricity, mosquito invasions and scary large wildlife at the back door.
He loved it, and with a single blow of an axe he was able to split large logs right down the middle. He looked relaxed for the first time in a long time, and his eyes went from stressed to peaceful. I knew right there and then that this was the man I wanted to spend my life with.
It was the perfect place for him to ask me…. and yet… nothing. So we drove home.
As I was driving on the New Jersey Turnpike, he was looking at the real estate paper dreaming of buying a house there… (one of his favorite hobbies) and with one leg up on the dashboard he said….
"Will you marry me?"
"Ok"
"I'm serious"
"I know"
Silence…..
"Really? You asked me while I'm driving on the ugliest high way in the world?!"
"Well, I mean it…"
So he isn't one for romance….
but neither am I.
So with no money we got married on August 15 2009 at his fathers lake house in East Berlin.
He surprised me with a honeymoon in Sodona Arizona…. in August. I never felt arid heat, witnessed red rock, purple skies, or walked through a ghost town. We had a fabulous time.
It wasn't long before I was expecting my first boy.
By this time after hard work, amazing grades, and an impressive resume of internships he landed the perfect job as a Financial Analyst. The corporate ladder was long and I knew that he would fly… he never makes a wrong step.
Not only does he provide for us, but he is an amazing father. The smartest thing he ever said was.
"I refuse to wake up in the middle of the night to help, so don't rely on me"
Yet…. when I was sound asleep, out cold with exhaustion, he would get up and take care of my duties without waking me up.
He is the best partner I could ask for. When I'm lacking in something, he picks up the pieces, he is always there to support me in whatever crazy thing I'm doing, and he guides me through thickets of thorns painlessly. I'm eccentric, he's practical. I'm flamboyant, he's shy. I'm mouthy, he's sensible and quiet. He is calculating, I'm a dreamer.
Twenty one months later, I had another baby boy. We had little money, but with his savvy ways he bought us a house with enough land in New Jersey to have horses. He took a week off of work and spent hours of hard work fixing the interior for us to move in while I stayed with the babies.
You will never see this man sitting around. He is strong as an ox and has a work ethic of the Amish. At least once a month he will do something that takes me off guard.
For instance, he turned a crappy old shed into a livable room and office. The craftsmanship is well done and it took him less then a week to finish it. He also built me a round ring out of found wood for my horse and spent all night in freezing temperatures finishing it on time for my birthdays so I would see it in the morning. How many bankers do that on their days off?
When I was a little girl I wanted to run a riding academy or petting zoo…. I knew that I wanted horses and lots of animals. I also wanted to be an artist, painting in my studio on my time off from teaching. I envisioned blonde hair, blue eyed children in my life, and pictured myself living off the land away from cities, and hoards of people.
How many people have all their wants and needs come true? Well sure…. by the time most people are 50 they have their stuff figured out….
But I'm going to brag for a second.
A 26 year old man gave me all of my dreams in less then 5 years.
It's only up from here. He continues to outdo himself and trump people three times his age. Proud is an understatement. I'm in awe of his brilliance.
Sure, he may not be very romantic, he can't sing, or dance, or draw, he's allergic to poison ivy, apples, and cats, and has an addiction to sunglasses and hats which he never wears…
Both of us have strengths and weaknesses.
Put us together and you have an unstoppable force. He is the left side of my brain, my heart, my soul…. I lived life before him with two left shoes on… the minute I met him my life started to work right. I haven't taken a wrong move since.
Last night he came running into the house from work, grabbed the keys to the truck and yelled "I'll be back in half an hour"
What is he up to? Sure enough almost exactly a half hour later he had returned. "Get away don't look!" My mom is standing next to him, smiling and nodding, lifting something big out of the truck. I waited patiently…. hearing a bunch of commotion.
He appears from around the garage holding a bag.
"Here you go Scooter"
I look into the bag…. splinters of mulch and twigs are inside.
Wood is the theme for five years of marriage.
"Thanks!" He has a funny sense of humor too….there is always a gag attached to something surreal.
"Well do you want to see your real present?"
"Sure!"
He walks me into his new office. There…. stood a beautiful tack trunk. Shiny grains of wood, with brass latches and galloping horses engraved along the bottom.
"It looks new!"
"It is…. "
My jaw dropped.
I have always wanted a nice tack trunk… it's something that equestrians cherish to hold all their horsey needs.
Ok…. so this man can be romantic. He trumped me. I have nothing to give that could be this nice or thoughtful.
This is my gift… I can speak volumes about the things this man has done for me and my family. I admire him for his hard work, his devoted love to me and our children. There aren't many men out there that are this loyal to the simple things in life. Family and Love.
I know that if you threw us in the middle of the woods with nothing to live on, we would survive and still love each other as if we were millionaires.
I dropped my three year old off at Daycare this morning. I jumped into the truck and backed out of the parking lot, looked over and saw a Dove sitting on the stoop of the parking lot. Doves are love birds, you never just see one without the other. I looked closer for the other, and sure enough I saw the male sitting on the ground. I thought it was odd… is he sick? I made a noise to startle him… he ruffled his feathers… oh no he's sick… my heart dropped how horrible.
I pulled back into the space, and watched… he stood up, and underneath his body was a baby. The mother jumped down and fed her baby and the male walked around the parking lot guarding his family. What a treat to see this family on our wedding anniversary.
Like love birds, I will never be far from my mans side, and will care for his offspring and for him till his dying days. I'm bound to him forever. I found my mate in life, and I can't see my world without him in it. Not many people can say that… I spent a lot of my life battling trivial things, countless hours struggling to find happiness, dealing with my lost world and letting it pull me down into a pit of depression. His strong hand grabbed mine and pulled me from my misery and handed me a life that I would hope most people find in heaven. His name is that of a Saint, and I truly feel he was put on this earth to save me. It's been the best five years of my life so far, and I can't wait to see what happens next.
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| The love birds…. Male on the bottom Female at the top. Just two birds. |
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| The male is moving on the bottom… something is under his butt! |
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| There you are! Mom jumps down and feeds baby, while the father walks around guarding his family. |
